Sunday, May 22, 2011

Over The Hill

Yep...that's me, I am officially in my thirties, and it's not too bad. I mean, I didn't wake up all wrinkly and having hot flashes, I'm just one day older than I was when I was 29, but I got some instant credibility May 14, 2011. People just feel like you are allowed to be more or accomplish more if you are older. In my VERY early 20's (2 weeks after turning 20) I got married. In my early 20's, I became a mother. When I was in my mid 20's, I bought my first house, I got a doctorate degree and then bought my second (forever) house. A little bit later in my 20's, I became an administrator all the while making 6 figures...pretty good, I'd say...for a kid.

We spend the first quarter of our lives wishing we were older, or pretending or trying to look older. There is a small period of time following that when we just are what we are, and that's ok. Then we spend the next 60 or so years doing the opposite of what we did the first 20.

I am what I am, and I am 30, like it or not. I'm going to do the best I can to live as long as I can in this time that I just am.

So what am I, now that I am 30: I'm mostly a stay-at-home mom, which some people find refreshing while others find down right ridiculous (which I find sort of hilarious in some situations)...personally, I fall somewhere between the two, but lean toward refreshing (most days). I am "Staff" as opposed to "Administrator" at work since I work pretty much never, it's hard to really be in charge of anything. My 10th wedding anniversary is in a couple of weeks and although I don't get butterflies every time the phone rings and it is Garth on the other line anymore, I would fight to the death for him and our family and our life together.

I squeezed a lot into my 20's, and sometimes it's hard to cope with reality after your total reality for so long is getting somewhere. When you spend 8 or 10 years in college, living in apartments and shopping in your parents' pantries, you get so focused on the goal that you forget that the journey you are in is a life you are living. A few days ago, Garth (hubby) was feeling kind of down, and I asked him what was wrong. He said he felt like life was passing us by. I have to admit, that when you spend A LOT of years getting somewhere, once you get there, it's rarely as awesome as your years of build up made it look. I realized and told him to open your eyes, life isn't passing us by, it's here, right now, if front of your face, THIS is life and we are living it. We are living the American Dream baby! It made us chuckle, but it also helped us to realize that we are truly blessed in life. I just got a little plaque that says "Blessings brighten when you count them", which is so true, so I am making an effort to count mine as often as possible and they always start with the 4 small hands and 20 tiny toes that poke and kick me most nights and the 2 strong arms that hold me when I need them most.

If my next 30 years are even half as awesome as the first, I'm one lucky girl!